I guess this will be my last post of the year aka MY 40th POST lol. 2011 sucked. Really? What more can I say? I’m ending it kinda how I started it. The once formerly unemployed is back to being unemployed. Funny how my last blog was sort of a premonition.

Am I mad? I was for like all of 15minutes. What’s a girl to do now? Get my health improved. Honestly with the appointments I have in the upcoming year, I was bound to get fired or get my hours cut. I’m over all this bullshit though. Did I love my job? No, I was more excited to be working again. 12 hour days including commute were definitely tiring. So what!! I no longer work in San Francisco against the pier with a beautiful view of the Bay Bridge and Ferry Building. Who cares?!!?

Shit If I’m not living…If I’m not living fucking nothing matters. Should I start creating a bucket list?  No! But I need to start living. I can’t be sad about anything even though for the past two weeks I’ve laid in bed and cried when I wasn’t visiting my doctor. I can’t be sad even though I may have to start a treatment. I can’t be sad that I word vomited to Mr. Moment and I know that’s a WHOLE ‘nother blog. I can’t be sad I’m unemployed, or single, or lonely, or broke. I don’t want to be characterized by sorrow or grief. 85% of this year has been sad. No more. It is easier typed than done.

Tomorrow when I should be getting ready for NYE I’ll probably be sleeping. Yes, I have plans but I’m not in the mood. Memoirs of A Bachelorette should be re-titled to My Life Sux, What’s Your Deal? lol I honestly can’t win for losing. If I had the money I’d be going to Hawaii. I need a vacation more than anyone I know…I need happier posts in my blog so I’ll double back!