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Every slore (whore/slut) I know is now getting married. WTF?!@! Seriously if I start sloring around will I meet my husband? I’ve never been the type to fuck a bunch of guys or date many men at the same time. HOEever the trend is becoming apparent if you ho it up ho it up then Mr. Right will ring it up.

I don’t know the number of penis’ I must encounter before the husband to be will appear, but I’m assuming between 10-25. I knew some ho’s! Fucking for burger ho’s. I’m just pretty envious that these slores have what I want. I don’t want to date hella men. I don’t want to have that awkward conversation to confirm if we are together or not. I just want my damn husband. So, if SLORING it up is what I must do, then…. I’m not stooping that low.

WHAT THE HELL AM I THINKING?!?! If I remove all my standards then I’ll attract an ain’t shit dude. Even though the slores who are now MRS. Ex-Slore have met some real good guys. I can’t take that chance. I usually get my ass whooped by Karma. I’d be the one who ends up with the HIV+ guy who ends up having 2 kids outside of our marriage. NO THANKS.

I was one of those little girls who always dreamed of being married. Not the wedding, but the actual commitment. I’d be perfectly okay getting married at city hall with a Nordstrom Rack dress on as long as we loved each other. I know many women who just dream of wearing the white dress and celebrating her nuptials in front of friends and family. Yea, that’s cool and all, but I want my mate. I want my life partner, father of my kids, provider of my household.

The older I get the more I see that dream diminishing. Am I worthy of being married? Can I give my all to someone? Will I ever meet him? Shit should I switch teams since Prop 8 passed? Na I can’t see myself taking it that far. I love my gays and lesbians, but I’m not dealing with someone gets a period every month like me. What I do know is I actually prefer commitment.

The single life has been pretty cool. I’ve met some interesting men to say the least. I haven’t slored it up which maybe I should have. It’s just not really in me. I want to cook breakfast for my man and have dinner waiting on him. I want to go 9 months carrying his seed inside me. I want to travel with him. I guess I’m just a traditionalist.

Whoever I’m suppose to be with it won’t be because I’ve slored it up. He’ll get me when the time is right. When I’m RIPE for picking, not bruised and banged up from slutting. At this point in my life I could be thinking about other things such as my education or job. Ya know what? I’m pretty content in both aspect. Yes, I hate my job but I’m employed with BENEFITS. Yes, its gonna take me 321 years to get my degree but I’m on the right path!! I just want my package complete.

Mary Joseph Jr.

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